the jellybum's jingle!

i know im not supposed to be here but i couldnt resist the thought of entering this world( the inner sanctum as he calls it)!!! it feels AAWWEESOMEEEE to be in someone else's head!


and if its his......what more could you ask for!



ha! ha! ha! nishath!

the blur

Sometimes the worst in life comes at one long stretch. And I think it has been the case of millions of life around the world. But the same couldn’t stand more corrected for the people of India, beginning with the 26 of November, there has been utter turmoil wherever you turn your head to. The ending November just brought about a saddening December.

Same’s been the case with me. I’ve lost hope and faith in almost anything and everything. Be it life, be it normalcy, be it even your friends – there is always the utter nonsense of it all. It’s like what you wanted to live is right in front of you and not happening to you. And the worst of which would usually take over a life is happening to you. Why does it always happen that you feel like you are always squished under a large thumb?

But people always tell that there is a comeback? When is this comeback? Considering the fact that when you want something you don’t get it at all. Take my case for instance, I’ve had so many dreams and aspirations, but it’s always been “what’s-best-for-you-beta-you-take-it-but-also-listen-to-us”. Everytime you do something there are like a thousand people around you to question it’s relevancy, it’s future, it’s outcome and God knows what else? When will they understand that it’s our life rather than theirs that they are playing with? I’d saved up my last salary and have been waiting to get back with my friends from Muscat for the past 7 months. I did not even spend a single buck from the money that I saved up. And see now what happens? I am under house arrest.

Let me ask you, where do you get all this world knowledge from? Will you being holed up in a house take you around the world? Some people might say – there is the whole world in front of you in the form of the internet. But I say – screw you! If you haven’t traveled, you haven’t seen nothing. I wanted to know, I wanted to see, I wanted to understand, but there is always someone or something to stop you. I cannot blame my people for not allowing me or anything, but also at the same time I loathe them so much. Just imagine – you look forward to something so much. And what do you get?

I hate to be me at the moment…

mirza ghalib - lajawab or kya nahin

"Mat pooch ke kya haal hai mera tere peeche?
Tu dekh ke kya rang tera mere aage..."

Ask not what separation has done to me
You see your poise (composure) when I come before you...



"Dil hee to hai na sang-o-khisht, dard se bhar na aaye kyon?
royenge hum hazaar baar, koee hamein sataaye kyon?"

Heart it is, not a stone or brick
Why shouldn't it feel the pain?
Let none tyrannize/torment this heart
Or I shall cry and cry again....

the soul of our heart

Today I am sad. My sadness knows no bounds for the fact that my favorite Grandma left for heaven’s abode. I know she looks over us, and even now I am haunted by the knowingness I shall hold her hand no more.

The last time I held her hand, I whispered into her ears that I shall not allow her to go so easily. She’d smiled even then. She’d smiled to let us know. She’s smiled to give us warmth.

My mind wandered. Here and there. I left practice and then discovered – I was lost in thoughts. I’d lost my helmet. Who would now ask me to check if her clock was still working? I’d lost time’s count and I am still sad.

She’d asked for me, a moment and more. But I am sad I wasn’t there. Could there be more love than what she’s given? I am still sad. I wasn’t there.

And then when I wished to see her, I cried. And for one last time I saw her fragile face. And smile at me she did so too. I am sad but I am there.

Chandra, my favorite grandma, forever you shall remain…

ma angels

Months and more
When a baby and less was I
She carried me around
Smiled at me
Took me in her arms
Woke up in the middle of the nights
Fed me
Made sure I burped
The songs she sang
The warmth of her touch
Mom I love you
Have
Am
Will
Always.

Days and nights,
Memories,
Laughs,
Frustrations,
Fights,
Secrets,
Hopes,
Wishes,
Anything & everything
The narrowness,
The thinness,
The path of what might be,
Wherever,
Whenever,
Anu – Mukz
I love u
Have
Am
Will
Always.

You all inspire me.
You move me.
You make me cry.
You make me laugh so hard it hurts.
You make me smile.
You make me know that you care.
You make me.